Limericks

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RingMaster · Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 12:30 am Post subject: more

While once with the Duchess at tea,
She asked "Do you burp when you pee?".
I said (with some wit)
"Do you fart when you shit?",
And felt it was one up to me.

RingMaster · Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 12:34 am Post subject:

There was a young lad from Cosham
Who took out his balls to wash em.
His mother said, "Jack,
If you don't put em back,
I'll jump on em both and I'll squash em.".

RingMaster · Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 12:35 am Post subject:

The hermaphrodite lived in Kew
Whom the local lads loved to screw.
cause she looked so sweet
upon the seat
Of a bisexual built for two.

RingMaster · Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 12:35 am Post subject:

There once was a man from Kildare
Who's arse was all covered in hair.
I tried to direct him
To find his lost rectum,
So he shaved it and out fell a chair.

RingMaster · Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 12:35 am Post subject:

There once was a man from Limerick
Who only thought with his dick.
He once used his brain
and wrote this dreadful refrain
and returned to pondering his prick.

RingMaster · Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 12:36 am Post subject:

There once was a man named Mort
Whose dick was decidedly short.
When he climbed into bed
His ladyfriend said,
"That's not a dick it's a wart."

RingMaster · Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 12:36 am Post subject:

There once was a man from Nantucket
Who's dick was so long he could suck it.
He said with a grin
While wiping his chin,
"If my ear were a cunt I could fuck it".

RingMaster · Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 12:36 am Post subject:

There once was a man from Nantucket
Who's dick was so long he could suck it.
He said with a grin
While wiping his chin,
"If my ear were a cunt I could fuck it".

RingMaster · Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 12:36 am Post subject:

I invited an old whore to tea,
And as we were discussing her fee
She gave me a shock,
when she pulled out her cock,
And announced she would fuck me for free.

RingMaster · Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 12:37 am Post subject:

There once was a man from out west
Who sucked on his wife with great zest.
Despite all her yowls
He sucked out her bowels,
And spat them all over her chest.

RingMaster · Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 12:37 am Post subject:

There once was a man from Peru
Who fell asleep in a canoe.
He dreamed of Venus,
And played with his penis,
And awoke with a handful of goo.

RingMaster · Posted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 12:37 am Post subject:

The new cinematorium
Is more than a porno emporium.
It's an uncontestable,
unisexial,
Mutual masterbatorium.